Lessons

Some things I’ve learned along the way:

• 

  Jean twirling at the Flagging party

  There are no guarantees in life; life can be short; and it can get really hard, so enjoy it fully while you can. THIS IS IT.

• Most people have to work hard to succeed.
• Be grateful.
• Be nice to others; be nice to yourself.
• If it feels good to your soul, your human potential, do it.
• Embrace pleasure.
• Never give up.
• Take care of your friends and family.
• Find your spiritual home/center.
• Magic is alive.
• Love is the greatest miracle.
• We die as we live in most cases.
• Watch your weight, take care of your teeth, don’t smoke cigarettes, take your medicine.
  

  David, Charles, CK, Jean at Flagging on Mother’s Day

• Stay active (use it or lose it).
• Tell the truth – that way, you don’t have to be careful of what you say (except for being nice).
• Be nice, don’t be an asshole, don’t yell, be fair, help your neighbor/your friend.
• Overcome or accept or otherwise deal with your issues (e.g., for me, anger).
• Grow a garden, dig in the dirt, eat healthy food, live gently and softly within this miracle of life.

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Marine Corps lessons:

Never give up.

Keep your weapon clean.

Forward.

Faster.

Keep your smokes dry.

Maintain your intervals.

Pass the word.

Squeeze the trigger.

Eat your fruit cocktail first.

Your Corps and your buddies are everything.

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What to say when you’re in bed with a woman

We were in bed, reading. Jean was reading a book by Margaret Atwood. I saw that her bookmark had some very nice beadwork hanging off what I’m sure is handmade paper, now fraying. A beautiful bookmark. So I went to the bookshelves and brought out a few of my bookmarks: Harvard Bookstore, Majors Scientific Books, a Lao Airlines boarding pass, a picture I’d cut off an old calendar, so on and so forth. There we were, in bed, sharing bookmarks. What a life!

I used to frequent used bookstores – and still do, just not to the

extent I used to. Time spent in the stacks meant that I was able to find some beautiful

old editions of classics, such as The Call of the Wild, White Fang, Rudyard Kipling’s complete works… And, as it turns out, Jean is a Jack London fan – she’s now re-reading my copy of White Fang, published in 1913.

A girl who likes gardening, books, White Fang, and bookmarks!

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Books read in the past month

The Hill Fights: The First Battle of Khe Sanh. I was in the Hill Fights for a few days. It was the heaviest, most intense combat imaginable. Here’s to the 1^st Battalion, 9^th Marines.

Just Kids by Patti Smith. An account of her life and relationship with Robert Mapplethorpe – “So honest and so pure as to count as a true rapture” (Joan Didion).

When Breath Becomes Air by Paul Kalanithi. A neurosurgeon’s account of his journey through lung cancer into death.

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New garden!

Herbs in new front garden: thyme, oregano, lemon grass, cilantro, basil, tarragon, sage, rosemary, lavender, chives, chamomile – so far.

Roses: Iceberg and Collette.

Flowers – most in clumps; some from previous garden; N = new: foxglove, iris, alstroemarium (N), coreopsis, tansy, daisy, purple trumpet vine (N), nicotiana (N), hellebores, California poppy, Mexican tarragon (N), sweet allysum, pineapple sage, clematis (vine), borage, impatiens aloe vera, camellia (tree), smoke tree (N), lantana, matilija poppy, forget-me-nots (Ohhh) (N), salvia, columbine (N), red mask flower (N), blue-eyed grass (N), verbena, calla lily, blueberry bushes (2) (N), nasturtium, oak leafed hydrangea (N).

Grass: none at all, except for blue-eyed grass, which is grown for its flowers.