CK's Journal

In the end we’re just carrying the water, tending the fire, planting and harvesting…

I was prompted to make this post by contact with a distant relative and a question from a friend near Point Reyes. My friend had asked, “What do you do?” (as I live my life). (Click photos to make big; then back arrow.)

Saturday. Got up at 6:30, fixed coffee and a little fruit bowl for Jean to have before her medications, and brought these to her. We drank coffee together, watched the sky and the distance from bed, and talked. From Jean’s place in bed she can see SF Bay and Golden Gate Bridge; I can see the Bay, Marin headlands, and Mt. Tamalpais. We call what we see in the mornings “the today show.” ♥

A little after 8:00 Jean got up and bathed and I fixed breakfast. This morning it was the usual: fruit bowl with yogurt and granola for Jean and toast and almond butter for me. We’re close to California’s Central Valley and Oregon’s orchards, so the fruit here is exemplary. This morning we had a mix of pear, apple, orange, strawberries, blueberries, banana, and grapes. When I was in Dallas I baked all our bread for quite a few years. Now here, there are several great bakeries, selling levain, spelt, and other crusty, coarse, tasty loaves that are even better than what I baked. Today’s bread is levain from the Cheeseboard Collective.

We ate together in the living room, and talked, again with the view. I showered and Jean did Pilates. I tended the plants on the deck (again, the view) and Jean made some phone calls. The way we live with the Bay, the City (SF), Marin, and the sky and clouds and sun and fog and garden all right here means that outside and inside are not separate. When it’s just a little warmer we’ll sleep with the French doors in the bedroom open to the outside – “one door nights” and “two door nights.”

Jean is working in the kitchen, getting a to-go lunch together for a friend who is unwell. Someone is coming over in a few minutes to help with the irrigation system. He came – thank you! We planned on a walk at the nearby middle school track, but didn’t do it. With my iPhone I’m in my third year of counting steps. In year two I increased steps by about a quarter mile and in year three, by another quarter mile.

Watered front garden for an hour. Plants in bloom right now are thyme, nasturtium, sweet alyssum, two kinds of alstroemeria, two kinds of California poppy, calla lily, three kinds of iris – including from Jean’s father, butterfly sage, borage, tansy, agapanthus, columbine, lavender, rose geranium, yellow tagetes, coreopsis, impatiens aloe vera, day lilies, and the lime tree.

Jean has had a contractor working on the downstairs bathroom. To start the job she had to move quite a bit of fabric and artwork out because the bathroom was basically used as a large storage area with a toilet and sink. There were many remnants of dyed and felted wool, which Jean sorted and bundled according to colors, and then stacked in the downstairs bedroom. Somehow, to me anyway, the stack of bundles became an art installation. Some of the textiles went to art schools or artists collectives. It’s like the extras from a lifetime of textile art.

Right now, she’s in her studio, working on the third in a series of self-portraits related to health challenges over the past few years. This one is heart-related. Others include the spine/pain and the neurological challenges of dysautonomia. I’m unsure about how long she’s been working on this series – a month, at least.

The house is kind a kind of unassuming one-story bungalow on the outside (with an extravagant garden). Inside it is like in the song, “hangings rich of many strange designs” very beautiful. The hidden away downstairs down winding stairs has a small room for Jean’s archives, a laundry room, a bedroom, a storage room, a bathroom, and a large bright, high-ceiling studio opening out on a deck and more garden. The deck reminds me of a Thai or Cambodian artisan area with its bamboo poles for hanging fabric.

Being as old as we are means (among other things) spending a lot of time taking care of our bodies. We’re like athletes, always working out, dealing with injuries and infirmities, eating special diets, trying to stay in shape…

Tonight we picked up our friend, Susan and went to dinner at Kiku Japanese restaurant.

Jean and Susan split some sushi and I had yakisoba noodles. Not unlike pad Thai.

I always look forward to going to bed with Jean in the evening. The goal is to get there before 9 pm and we usually make it. We take turns deciding on “the entertainment” (computer TV) which basically lasts for an hour. Right now it’s kind of rotating among White Lotus, the Americans, This is Us, and some mash-up of Seinfeld, Colbert, Midnight Diner, and Mark Wiens. For us, TV is one of the outcomes of the pandemic, i.e., something that changed as a result of the pandemic and lockdown. Other changes include having as much mayonnaise and butter as I want, because, you know, we could all die at any time. I’m out there on the edge again, man.

Sunday. Up at 6:15, fix coffee, meds together, small fruit bowl for Jean so meds won’t be on empty stomach (I always put it in the plastic bowl I got on a Cathay-Pacific flight about 25 years ago). Lying in bed watching the sky and sea and land. We did a short “grateful” – in which we set an alarm for five minutes and lie there quietly thinking of things for which we are grateful.

Breakfast was poached egg and toast. My secrets to poached eggs is very light oil to skillet, cold water brought to boil, slip egg sloooowly into the water so that it cooks a little as it goes in, cover to skillet. When they’re about done, use spatula to loosen eggs. Turn over if wanted (I sometimes make a mess doing this.) and poach to desired doneness. Serve on toasted levain or spelt. Trader Joe fresh “medium” salsa from cold case. In this and all other matters, no salt cooking or serving. Tastes great!

Walked at Martin Luther King Middle School track. There were people of every age – old and young – and every physical ability, walkers, runners, fast and slow, and soccer teams playing. When the soccer game is over there will be a volleyball game on the field.

Lunch together. I had a sandwich made from leftover bun bo xao beef and Jean had leftover sushi.

Nap.

I worked on the sprinkler system in the garden. As always I got soaked but finally got things set up for the dry season. Jean worked on her “Kona’s rug,” which was just cleaned. Kona was her well-loved black Labrador. We talk about getting a dog, but it doesn’t seem practical at our age. Still…

Obsolete: 25 years ago I realized that one of the major disconnects between the healthcare system and refugees and immigrants was that patients from foreign lands were worked up like patients from the US (except of course that there were more barriers for foreigners). Despite a high probability of parasites among patients from developing nations, parasitic infection was a distant differential so there was always months of delay before getting to the cause of a problem. And, at least in primary care, emergency care, and elsewhere there was a general lack of awareness of infectious and tropical diseases. Thus was the book Infectious and Tropical Diseases conceived.

I developed the differential diagnosis sections of the book and then two colleagues and I worked on diseases sections for over a year and in 2006 it was published by Elsevier Science. A unique characteristic of the book was that diseases, symptoms, and geography were extensively cross-referenced, so that readers could quickly zero in on symptoms/diseases endemic to particular locales. It was a good book and we got good reports from practitioners working in refugee and international health. Yesterday I had the jarring realization that the innovative cross-referencing concept has been made obsolete by AI. Of course, the book has been out-of-date since a few years after publication, but the concept!

Here is what Chat GPT said in response to the query “50-year old Kurdish male from Iraq with abdominal pain 10 years duration:” “The diagnostic approach should consider both common global causes and region-specific infectious, environmental, and psychosocial factors, particularly given the Kurdish population’s potential exposure to trauma, limited healthcare access, and endemic infections.” Hydatid disease, strongyloides, and schistosomiasis were noted as risks by ChatGPT.

If this all seems irrelevant, recall the 2014 Ebola case undetected for several days at a major Dallas hospital. Now that was scary, at least among ER staff, refugee health workers, and people living near the sick man! Three cheers to AI!

I lost track of keeping track of everything. Getting a little random.

From my last trip to the bathroom about 0500 I saw through the deck door the yellow/orange moon hanging low over the Bay. It was beautiful but not enough to wake Jean.

I’m thinking there’s a certain sameness to life these days. There is love, there is surpassing beauty in life, lots of gratitude, some seriously good times and seriously hard times. I feel like I understand life better. I think of the challenges of the day. I think often about David and Leslie and Jean. I think about traveling, war, working with refugees, the clinic, friends, people who have helped me (and people who have hindered me, people I’ve worked with, writing, teaching, hospice, life, the end of life, the house in Dallas. I’m happy I worked so hard and accomplished what I accomplished. We do social things 2-4 x week like dinner with friends, lunches out, museum trips (Jean does the museums; me, not so much.

Another day: Tracking in detail.

Coffee in bed – Jean’s mug is from a gallery in Red Lodge when we went to see Courtney in Montana and my mug I bought from a Chinese dollar store during David’s and my first trip to San Francisco. Fruit snack in a Cathay Pacific mini-bowl from long ago. ♥

Talking

Breakfast – JC smoked salmon and cream cheese on spelt, fruit salad (orange, apple, grapes, strawberries, blueberries, banana); CK fruit salad with yogurt and toast (levain and spelt) with almond butter from Berkeley Bowl – all served on plates from Jean’s Mom and bowls made by a neighborhood potter, James Newton, and I’m eating with my spoon from Cathay Pacific. 

We go to a bayside art and nature place (“The Bulb”), but the wind off the Bay was so strong and cold we left and went to our usual weekend walking place, the MLK Middle School track. On the way stopped at Monterey Market for the first fresh corn of the year and a big bunch of chard. On to the track.

The other night I made stuffed small new potatoes like we had at the Amet Haveli hotel in Udaipur (this time I stuffed with cheese, chives, ham, z’atar). Baked, split, scooped out, mix cream cheese, lots of chives, tiny pieces of a small slice ham, potato and stuff the little potatoes. Top with cheese – used provolone. Re-baked ~10 minutes.

This week Jean has been to a women’s gathering in Sonoma, I’ve had lunch with Peter N-R, and we’ve had dinner with Nancy and Peter and with Susan.

Jean finished an art piece: The Heart. See above re series. 

Challenges faced: Pain, feeling tired, medication side effects, the complexities of navigating the health care system even when things are going pretty well, rising prices, the moral decline/the corruptionof America, the gutting of values of decency, honor, honesty, and so on.

Back to the photo of the morning sky:

Morning has broken, like the first morning.
Blackbird has spoken, like the first bird.
Praise for the singing, praise for the morning.
Praise for them springing fresh from the Word

“Baby, ain’t it all worthwhile.”

Summary points:

• There are many examples of successful non-violent protest movements.
• A relatively small percentage of a population can cause change.
• Protests can increase awareness and empower people.

A few of the protest movements that have succeeded include:

• Maidan Revolution (or Revolution of Dignity) in Ukraine, 2014.
• Civil Rights Movement in US, 1950s-1960s.
• Suffragette Movement in US and UK, late 18^th-early 20^th
• Anti-apartheid South Africa, 1950-1990s.
• Velvet Revolution in Czechoslovakia, 1989
• Indian Independence Movement in India, 1915-1947

Did any of the above accomplish 100% of its goals? Of course not. 100% is not in the nature of human endeavors.

What percentage of a population protesting creates the critical mass needed for change? If about 3.5% of a population is actively engaged in a sustained manner, the protests are likely to succeed through:

• Gaining media attention.
• Paralyzing infrastructure.
• Creating division among elites and security forces.
• Forcing negotiations or concessions.

The 3.5% figure comes from the work of Erica Chenoweth in studying the issue across nations and cultures. BBC published an article on “The ‘3.5% rule’: How a small minority can change the world.” 

Awareness: Participating in protest is empowering and creates opportunities for connection among like-minded people. We are not alone and it is not futile!

Thanks to DK and ChatGPT. Click photo for a nice big one.

Hands Off!

Hands off healthcare, Social Security, the arts, law enforcement, universities, the environment, national parks, our allies, freedom of speech, history, our future, and so much else!

“She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.” (Proverbs 31:25)

This document is copied from one sent to every household in Finland. Because of their proximity to Russia, Norway and Sweden are also doing this. But we have our own sources of disruption and this a good tool for thinking and planning. Among the differences between this document and similar ones is that this one addresses issues such as functional capacity, hybrid influence activities, and cyber attacks. What a world! The last sentence in the document says something like: The competence and activities of individuals in community form the basis for society’s ability to act when something extraordinary happens.

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This checklist contains the most important instructions on how to prepare for incidents and crises and how to act during different situations.

What is preparedness and why is it important?

Personal preparedness

• means preparing for different incidents, crises and emergency conditions
• affects how well you, your loved ones and society will cope with an extraordinary situation
• consists of home emergency supplies, knowledge, skills, functional capacity and a sense of community
• does not mean that you think something bad will happen.

How are incidents reflected in day-to-day life?

Incidents are situations in which the vital functions and services of society do not function as usual.

Lengthy incidents affecting large areas particularly interfere with the normal functioning of people’s everyday lives and society.

Incidents include:

• power cut
• water outage or water contamination
• disruptions in communications infrastructure
• disruptions in payment and banking services.

Basic knowledge and skills help you cope with many situations

You will cope with many situations when you:

• Stay calm.
• Think about what the situation involves and which instructions you know are related to it. How does the situation affect you, your loved ones and the people local to you?
• Follow official communications and emergency warnings.
• Follow the instructions.
• List the most important things to do in the situation and take action.
• Help others to the best of your ability.

Home emergency supplies checklist

Home emergency supplies checklist:

• bottled water and clean containers with lids for storing water
• ready-to-eat and easy-to-cook foods that you use in your regular everyday life
• radio operating on batteries or otherwise without mains electricity
• a flashlight or some other lamp operating on batteries or otherwise without mains power
• a charged backup power supply
• essential medicines that last you a little longer
• iodine tablets if there is someone in your household in the target group for the iodine recommendation (people at most 40 years old, pregnant or breastfeeding)
• hygiene supplies that allow you to stay clean without water
• a small amount of cash (different denominations)
• duct tape for sealing windows and vents
• also enough food and water for your pets

Also remember the following:

• Get sufficient knowledge and competence.
• Do not lose your head when getting the supplies if there is an incident.

Read more about home emergency supplies

Pay attention to functional capacity in preparedness

Learn aspects can affect functional capacity. These may include ageing, disability or illness.

Use the following questions to think about which arrangements enable your or your loved one’s preparedness:

• How will the incidents specifically affect your everyday life?
• What restrictions should be taken into account?
• What can you do yourself and where do you need help from others in various situations?
• Who could help you the quickest if something happened?
• Should you improve your safety net?

Hybrid influence activities may cause disruptions

Hybrid influencing refers to harmful activities involving a wide range of methods which foreign states use to cause a detrimental effect on the target country.

For people, hybrid influence activities usually manifest as ordinary disruptions, such as service interruptions, or they may not be visible at all. If hybrid influencing succeeds, it may manifest itself in people’s lives, for example, as a loss of trust or an increase in fears and polarisation.

You do not have to separately prepare for hybrid influencing as such, but rather make sure you are prepared for incidents.

Information influence activities undermine the functioning of society

Information influence activities refer to harmful activities involving a wide range of methods, typically conducted by a state actor. The aim is for people or society to act against their own interests.

A person sharing their views or official communications are not examples of information influencing.

Read more about information influence activities

Protect yourself against disinformation and information influence activities

In protecting yourself against disinformation and information influence activities, it is important to

• identify the topics through which it can be the easiest to appeal to your thinking and emotions
• identify how situations and issues affect your feelings and thoughts.

Think about

• which issues cause concern or stir strong emotions in you or scare you, for example
• how you regard incidents that upset or anger you and what kind of behaviour do they cause in you
• does the way you look for information during a crisis support or reduce your wellbeing
• what cognitive biases may affect the way you receive and process new information.

Look for more detailed instructions for protecting yourself against disinformation and information influence activities

Do not provide visibility for false information

• Check where the information originated.
• Do not share any information you are not certain about.
• Base your assessment of reliability on the facts of the content.
• Do not share content that you know to contain incorrect information.
• Think about why a discussion is occurring before reacting to content.

What are epidemics and pandemics?

An epidemic refers to a situation where a communicable disease occurs more than normally in the people of a certain area.

A pandemic is a situation in which an epidemic spreads geographically over a large area, for example across continents.

Can I prepare for pandemics?

To prepare for a serious health threat, it is a good idea to know how it could affect your everyday life. Each pandemic situation is unique and requires appropriate measures.

The authorities will tell you if you need to take special measures due to the disease situation.

Do this in the event of a pandemic

The most important thing is to follow the instructions and recommendations of the authorities and healthcare.

The best way to prevent the spread of infectious diseases and people falling ill is by ensuring good hygiene and vaccinations.

What are cyberattacks and cyber incidents?

Society depends on information systems. Related disruptions therefore have a great impact on the functioning of society and everyone’s day-to-day life. During an incident or attack, the services do not function normally.

Attacks on organisations or societal functions are particularly prone to cause extensive incidents.

Prepare for cyberattacks

Be prepared that cyberattacks may affect your everyday life:

• your network and telephone connections may be interrupted and power may be cut
• card payment and online banking services may be disabled
• official services or websites cannot be accessed.

You should also be aware of the risk of data breaches and leaks. It is important that you protect your data well.

See more detailed instructions on preparing for cyberattacks

Protect yourself against cyberattacks

• Make sure that your accounts and services have strong passwords and use multi-factor authentication.
• Install device updates and protect your devices against viruses, for example.
• Use several electronic identification devices.
• Act securely in online services and also pay attention to information security at the workplace.

See more detailed instructions on how to protect yourself against cyberattacks

What are natural phenomena and major accidents?

Natural phenomena and major accidents include:

• storms and floods
• wildfires and major building fires
• accidents involving dangerous substances
• radiation hazards
• other high-risk unforeseen events.

How people are alerted of the hazards

Approaches for issuing immediate hazard warnings include:

• Emergency warning
• General alarm signal

Early warnings may be given of weather phenomena that pose a significant risk, such as storms. This helps prepare for them and therefore reduces the damage caused.

Why should you prepare for storms and floods?

During a storm, strong winds and especially gusts of wind cause damage.

Flood water can cause damage as the water rises in a built-up area due to sudden heavy rainfall, rising sea levels on the coast or rapid melting of snow cover.

Prepare for storms and floods

Storms:

• Follow the weather reports and warnings in your area.
• Think about the risks that may arise in your environment during a storm and use this as the basis for preparing.
• Take precautions by having home emergency supplies and necessary goods.

See more detailed instructions on preparing for storms

Floods:

• Find out if you live in a flood hazard area or if an urban flood can affect your residential area.
• Follow the weather reports and warnings in your area.
• Take precautions by having home emergency supplies and necessary goods.

See more detailed instructions on preparing for floods

Do this during a storm or a flood

Storms:

• Stay indoors.
• Follow the communications of the rescue department in your area.
• Do not call the emergency number unless the storm poses an immediate risk of accident or death.

See more detailed instructions on what to do during a storm

Floods:

• Protect your assets from flood damage.
• Make sure you are safe: do not go to flooded areas or enter flood water.
• Follow the instructions given by the rescue department and the authorities in your area.
• Move away from the area or go to the upper floors of your building.

See more detailed instructions on what to do during a flood

Why should you prepare for wildfires and building fires?

Fires can pose a major risk to life, health and property. Toxic combustion gases pose the greatest threat to health.

You can prevent the risk of fire through your actions:

• Exercise caution whenever handling fire and using electrical appliances.
• Identify potentially hazardous situations and take risks into account.

Prevent and prepare for wildfires and building fires

• Wherever you are, make sure your behaviour does not pose a risk of fire.
• Be careful whenever dealing with live fire.
• Do not light a fire if there is any risk that it may get out of control.

Do these:

• Make sure your smoke detectors are in order.
• Learn first-aid extinguishing skills.

Follow these steps if you notice a fire

• Report the fire to the emergency number 112.
• Try to extinguish the fire if it can be safely done.
• Warn and help others and save yourself.

Remember that breathing combustion gases is dangerous.

See more detailed instructions:

• What should I do if I notice a wildfire?
• What should I do if there is a fire in the building?

The spreading of hazardous materials into the environment

Hazardous materials could end up in the environment because of an accident, for example. Chemical substances can cause a variety of symptoms.

Remember that it is often impossible to identify hazardous materials based on your senses. If there is a warning of hazardous material, follow the instructions given by the authorities even if you do not notice the hazard.

Do this if a hazardous substance is spreading to the environment

If hazardous material is spreading in the area, a general alarm signal and an emergency warning are used to warn people.

• Seek shelter indoors and stay indoors until you are informed that the threat is over.
• Follow the instructions given by the authorities in emergency warnings.

If you are in a location where a presumably hazardous substance is being released into the environment:

• Protect your respiratory tracts and walk away from the area.
• Call 112 for help.
• Follow the instructions given by the authorities.

Radiation hazard

Situations involving radiation hazards may include:

• a serious accident at a nuclear power plant in Finland or in nearby areas
• an accident in the transport of radioactive material
• the use of a nuclear weapon in Finland or nearby areas.

The release of radioactive material into the environment depends on what has happened and the weather in the area.

If a radiation hazard occurs, the rescue department in your area will inform you with an emergency warning and give instructions.

How to prepare for a situation involving a radiation hazard

• Learn how to seek shelter indoors with your loved ones.
• Know the alarm methods: an alarm signal and an emergency warning are used to warn people of the radiation hazard.
• Know which communication channels are used: the 112 application, television, radio and the websites of the authorities.
• Know the authorities providing instructions: rescue department in your area, Radiation and Nuclear Safety Authority (STUK).
• Buy medicine iodine tablets at home according to the recommendation.

In the event of a radiation hazard

If there is a radiation hazard in the area, a general alarm signal and an emergency warning are used to inform people.

If this happens, do as follows:

• Seek shelter indoors and stay indoors until you are informed that the threat is over.
• See and follow the instructions given by the authorities in emergency warnings.

Seeking shelter indoors

Learn how to seek shelter indoors with your loved ones.

Follow these steps if you hear the general alarm signal or the emergency warning prompts you to seek shelter indoors:

• Go inside your home or the nearest indoor space.
• Follow the authorities’ emergency warnings and act according to their instructions.
• Stop ventilation and seal any openings from which air can flow into the interior space.
• Seek shelter indoors until the authority reports that the situation is over.

How do I prepare for disruptions in payment services?

Prepare for disruptions in payment services:

• Keep a small amount of cash at home.
• Prepare with home emergency supplies.
• Have the cards of two different banks.
• Use several strong identification methods.

See more detailed instructions on preparing for disruptions in payment and banking services

What should I do during a disruption in payment or banking services?

• Follow the information provided by your bank about the situation.
• Find out if you have cash or if some other method of payment works.
• Use your home emergency supplies.

See more detailed instructions on what to do during disruptions in payment and banking services

Preparedness for military threats and civil defence

Preparedness and the maintenance of defence aim to create a preventive restraint to avoid a military threat to Finland. There are many ways to prevent threats and if threat prevention fails, any attacks will be countered by military defence.

Preparing for civil defence is a statutory task of the authorities. Civil defence means that civilians are protected from the effects of war and the conditions for survival and safeguarding society’s functional capacity are ensured.

National defence belongs to everyone

In the event of an armed attack on Finland, Finland would defend its region, population and society, making full use of its resources.

National defence includes

• the capacity of civil society to act during emergency conditions
• armed defence
• the duties of persons liable for non-military service
• voluntary defence.

The national defence obligation applies to all persons aged 18 or over but under the age of 68 living in Finland. They could be assigned tasks according to each person’s abilities.

Civil defence shelters and evacuation

Civil defence shelters are prepared for use and used to seek shelter if so ordered by the rescue authorities.

Find out about the practices for seeking shelter in a civil defence shelter that apply to you from

• your housing company’s rescue plan
• your workplace’s emergency plan
• your municipality’s services.

Read more about sheltering in civil defence shelters

Evacuation is not always necessary even in war conditions.

• Evacuation is carried out if other civil defence measures are insufficient for protection.
• The authorities will provide information and instructions if it is necessary to leave the area.

Read more about evacuations

Your role during a military conflict

• In the event of a war, conscripts who have completed military service and persons liable for non-military service would carry out their duties in accordance with their training and competence.
• Civilians would have more responsibility for maintaining the functioning of society, and they would be obliged to participate in tasks that meet their abilities.

Read more about what your role would be during a military conflict

Prepare for long power cuts

• Prepare with home emergency supplies.
• Learn the skills you would need to operate without electricity.
• Get a lamp that runs on batteries or without mains power.

Access to information:

• Enable your power grid company’s disruption notifications for your area if available.
• Make sure that you know how to get information about the situation during a prolonged power cut. In the event of a prolonged power cut, the telecommunications and mobile networks will cease to function.
• Get a radio that runs on batteries or without mains power.
• Discuss with your loved ones what to do if you cannot contact each other.

See more detailed instructions on preparing for power cuts

Do this during a power cut

• Switch off electrical appliances, especially any heat-generating devices.
• If there is water coming from the tap, collect it into a clean container.
• Do not pour water down the drain or flush the toilet.
• Think about how can keep warm at home.

When the power cut ends:

• Do not start all electrical devices at once.
• Check that no heat-generating appliances are switched on unless used as they pose a fire hazard.

See more detailed instructions on what to do during a power cut

Terrorism causes fear and a lack of security

• Terrorism aims to create fear and make people feel unsafe.
• The authorities work together to prevent acts by addressing the root causes of terrorism.
• The Finnish Security Intelligence Service is constantly monitoring threats.

Do this if you are the victim of a life-threatening attack or a terrorist attack

1. If you can, get away.
2. If you cannot escape, hide and seek shelter.
3. If you are in a safe place, call 112 for help.

Prepare for disruptions in communications infrastructure

• Enable your network and telephone operator’s disruption messaging services.
• Save the customer helpline number.
• Get a radio that runs on batteries or without mains power.
• Discuss with your loved ones what to do if you cannot contact each other.

See more detailed instructions on preparing for disruptions in communications infrastructure 

Do this if network and telephone connections do not work

• If possible, check for information about the incident either on your operator’s website or customer service by telephone.
• See your operator’s communications about the situation.
• The authorities provide information on serious incidents on YLE’s channels if other communication channels do not work.

See more detailed instructions on what to do during disruptions in communications infrastructure 

Prepare for water cuts and water contamination

• Prepare with home emergency supplies and enough drinking water.
• Reserve clean containers with lids for water.
• Enable your water company’s disruption notifications for your area if available.
• Think about how you would take care of your hygiene without water and prepare based on your needs.

See more detailed instructions on preparing for water outages

Do this when water is out or contaminated

• Follow the communications of your local water utility and municipality.
• If the water has been contaminated, the authorities may provide information about the situation using emergency warnings and official information.
• Use the water you have reserved in your home emergency supplies as your drinking water and take care of your hygiene using the supplies reserved for this purpose.
• Share information about the instructions issued by the authorities and help your loved ones and those living nearby.

When the water outage ends:

• Follow the instructions issued by the water utility and the municipality.
• Run the taps to clean your pipes.

For more detailed instructions, see: 

• What should I do during a water outage?
• What should I do if the water is contaminated?

You can prepare for difficult situations

Think about

• how you might react to a crisis?
• which positive actions have previously made you feel better in difficult situations?
• which activities and entertainment could help you keep your spirits up?
• would you or one of your neighbours or loved ones need support or help?
• which services of your municipality and organisations could you contact for help and support?

Read more about coping during a crisis

False information impairs functional capacity

False information and information influence activities may impair your coping and affect your functional capacity.

• Distance yourself from the incident and the flood of information if you feel stressed by the situation.
• Consider whether the amount of information you are exposed to or your media habits support or impair your coping and mental wellbeing.
• Assess how much you may be exposed to false or misleading information and attempts to manipulate your emotions.

Get help and support if you are struggling

Different parties provide online, telephone and face-to-face counselling. A helpline may provide you with advice on who to contact.

Support providers include

• healthcare and social welfare
• church and other religious communities
• non-governmental organisations.

See more detailed instructions for seeking help

Help and participate

You can help improve the collective ability to cope in extraordinary and difficult situations.

• Learn skills that help you and others. Different parties offer training in areas such as first aid, first-aid firefighting, preparedness and national defence.
• Participate in volunteering. As a volunteer, you can contribute to building a sense of community, help others and participate in rescue tasks, for example, during an extraordinary situation.
• Build a sense of community: participate in joint activities and discussions in your neighbourhood, village, workplace and other groups in your area.
• Be prepared to help others. Children and young people, the elderly or other special groups in particular may need support during extraordinary situations.

Read more about how you can help and participate

Safety and a stable society are part of preparedness

When preparing for crises, it is important that people

• trust their own and society’s ability to protect themselves from threats, act in crisis situations and recover from them
• feel that they can influence how safety is achieved for everyone in their living environment
• maintain trust in other people and are prepared to support others
• participate in constructive dialogue with others and democratic decision-making.

Do this in an emergency

• Call the emergency number 112.
• Listen and answer the questions asked of you.
• Follow the instructions given by the emergency response centre operator.

Only call the emergency number in urgent emergencies.

Everyone is obliged to help

Remember that

• everyone has a duty to help if someone is in danger
• a person in need of help may not ask for your help
• just because someone else is already helping the person does not relieve others present of their responsibility to help
• failure to help is a punishable act.

Preparedness in housing companies

Housing companies must prepare for various incidents and crises.

Safety:

• the building has an up-to-date rescue plan
• residents know their responsibilities
• residents are familiar with safety instructions and know how to follow them.

If the housing company has a civil defence shelter:

• it is properly maintained and has the necessary equipment
• the shelter can be commissioned within 72 hours on the order of the rescue authority
• the building residents know how to prepare the shelter for use.

Read more about preparedness in housing companies

Comprehensive security is about cooperation between different operators

Different parties in society cooperate in preparing for and acting during incidents and crises, for example by maintaining the security of supply and assessing risks.

These include:

• national, regional and local authorities
• companies and employers
• organisations and religious communities.

The day-to-day activities of the police and rescue services also lay the foundation for acting during incidents and crises.

The competence and activities of individuals form the basis for society’s ability to act when something extraordinary happens.

1.

I awoke in a dream feeling incredibly good. Better than no pain; feeling literally incredibly good through my mind and entire body. I thought I must be dying. What do I do now? I said the Lord’s Prayer. Then I started over in the prayer and drifted back into unconsciousness.

2.

We were talking about what we were trying to do. Leslie was working on increasing quality and decreasing suffering – what makes us (patients and providers in the healthcare system) do better. I was thinking about the complexities of the interactions of people with the system. “If anyone can make it better it’s you,” I said to her. I was thinking about what a thing it is to do this work on the bodhisattva road.

Amen

In August 2023 I applied for VA benefits. I had three goals:

• 

  Y’all take your time

  Be registered for VA healthcare.

• Receive a determination on disability related to combat.
• Have my discharge papers (DD214) corrected so that all awards are shown on the document.

One by one the goals were achieved – after many communications back and forth, consultations with veterans service officers at the Alameda County welfare department, examinations by VA medical staff, support from Jean, Leslie, David, and Jeff, and finally, after interventions by my Congressperson and by the Sergeant-Major of the Marine Corps. All goals were finally achieved last week. 15 months. I realize I’ve posted about this before. This one is happiness and a little more info.

 

I was in the crosswalk crossing a busy street when a car blew past me – not dangerously close, but too close. I shook my cane at him. I thought what a picture I must be, 80 years old shaking my cane at some guy already a block away. That’ll teach him!

Today I went for a walk at Point Isabel on the SF Bay. Cool ocean breeze blowing across the bay, listening to Van Morrison singing, “Oh the water, oh the water… and it stoned me to my soul.” We had a picnic in the van parked beside the bay, at the miles-long dog park, and San Francisco in the foggy distance (the bridge completely obscured with foggy clouds, but you can still see Alcatraz). The dog park is so big there’s just a few dogs around, including one doing little tricks with a woman. It seems to us that almost everyone you encounter at this place is nice to encounter. After lunch we took a nap on the actually very comfortable van bed. Jean was in the sun. We both slept well.

The VA has come through for me. I’m a partly disabled American veteran. I’m registered at the Oakland VA clinic. I drove over there to register for care, which was easy. It just took me 13 months to get here. It was like what you might expect at an Oakland VA facility at the edge of downtown. In terms of demographics most of the patients I saw were older Black men. Then Latinos, then White. People were friendly and there seemed to be a lot of respect happening.

The VA claimed that I said I didn’t complain about any injuries before now because “he didn’t want to jeopardize his career.” Laugh my ass off! A career as a corporal in the infantry. There’s a career for you! What I told the examiner was that I didn’t complain because I was a warrior and complaining isn’t part of warrior culture. Unless you’re complaining about the Marine Corps or the VA.

They finally looked at my entire personnel record and saw documentation of all awards, including those not listed on my discharge papers. I could have had the discharge papers corrected 50+ years ago, but I would have had to stay in the Corps another week or so and more than anything else I wanted out. As long as you’re in they own you. Goodnight, Chesty, wherever you are.

We went out west to Montana and Wyoming a couple of weeks ago. We were in Bozeman, Red Lodge, Billings, and Sheridan. The high point for me was a long drive in the countryside with Courtney. We also visited the Little Big

Horn Battlefield where Custer and his troops were defeated. There are markers where the men were killed – a hundred or more in one place, ten in another, two in another, five or six in another. A bad, lonely way to die.

The election is over. The dream is over – one that started well before Kamala Harris.

Shotgun house. He lived with a prostitute in the front room of a shotgun house off Woodall-Rogers Freeway near downtown. (A shotgun house is a narrow one-story shack that could theoretically be cleared with one shotgun blast through the front door.) In the course of being treated for cancer he suffered a radiation injury that caused triplegia, paralysis of both legs and one arm. The other arm wasn’t much good. When he came home from the hospital the woman put him on a bedpan and left him there for a day or two. When I got there the skin over his coccyx was intact, but was kind of purplish. Within a few days the skin began to change color and underlying tissue began to break down and soon there was a large (~10 inches in diameter) and growing decubitus ulcer (down to the bone). I would clean the ulcer and we would talk. He was bitter about what had happened with the cancer treatment as I recall, but he had been a hard life before the illness and injury and he was mostly accepting or resigned, or so it seemed to me.

From time to time when I was there, the woman would bring a trick through his room on the way to her room. She was a heavy drinker and often smelled of liquor. She was sweet-natured and pretty in her own way, and I liked her. Teaching her to care for him was a real challenge.

The ulcer got bigger and bigger and after a few months he died. A couple of years later I saw the woman on a corner in another part of town and stopped to talk with her. She was drunk and smelled pretty strong. She asked me if I wanted to have sex with her, but I said no thank you and gave her some money. That was the last time I saw her.

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Eggnog. He lived alone in the Cedar Springs projects. He had head and neck cancer (squamous cell carcinoma) with many tumors in the nodes of his neck and down into his chest. He had a mattress on his living room floor and he got around by crawling from one room to another. He had difficulty swallowing and was unable to take any solid food. He liked eggnog, which was fine around Christmas, but problematic after the holidays. I went to quite a few stores to find the last of the eggnog. After that he had to make do with protein drinks, which at the time were not as readily available as they are now.

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Burned. There had been a gas shortage and two brothers decided to hoard cans of gas to sell at a big profit. He lit a cigarette and the gas exploded, burning him over most of his body. After months in the Parkland burn unit he was finally discharged. He didn’t do his exercises and ended up with his arms frozen in a flexed position. He had no fingers, no nose, no ears – every part of his body that protruded had been burned off. He was pretty much all scar tissue.

He lived alone the same Cedar Springs projects as the man with head and neck cancer. His wife would come over sometimes and would throw his meals-on-wheels food on the floor. When he walked he would stagger; when he went out the children in the projects would throw things at him and call him names.

I don’t know what happened to him.

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A prayer. The promotora de salud (lay health promoter) and I went to see a woman with far-advanced cancer. She was in a coma and had gangrene. She lived in one of those barren outlying Oak Cliff pink brick apartment buildings where gangs pretty much ruled. The main thing we were there for was for the promotora to pray for the patient. We were there at her bedside – the patient and her daughter, the promotora, and me, all holding hands. Everything was in Spanish, except when the promotora leaned over to me and whispered, “I think her toe just fell off.” It had.

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Dressing change. There was a homeless man who hung around on Bryan Street. One of his legs had an old injury that was chronically infected. The lower part of the leg was markedly enlarged and hard and suppurating. He refused to go to Parkland, the county hospital.

At the time, my students and I were operating out of the “police storefront” at the corner of Bryan and Annex. The police had banned the homeless man from coming inside after he had used their toilet to have a huge and hugely malodorous bowel movement.

He would come to the storefront every week and one of the students or I would change the dressing on that leg. It was literally a weekly dressing change that involved cutting away the old exudate and blood-soaked dressing and putting on a new dressing. He would sit on the bench of the picnic table or a retaining wall outside the storefront for someone to change the dressing. I thought the maggots might be what was keeping him alive. I was surprised at how fast maggots can move.

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Staying home. Ms. Brown lived in a sparse one-bedroom apartment with Mr. Escalera. She had rheumatoid arthritis, was home-bound, and in fact, mostly bed-bound. I recall that the first time the students and I turned her over a multitude of cockroaches scattered out from under her back. She had several health problems, especially the pain from RA. She was a nice woman with a good spirit and was very strong mentally. While the students were in the bedroom with Ms. Brown, Mr. Escalera and I would sit at their little kitchen table, talking and him smoking. I marveled at how he was able to keep her at home – get her to the bathroom, take care of food, clean the apartment, everything. After a few years there were changes made in where and how the students and I were operating, and we quit seeing Ms. Brown. Ultimately, she developed cancer. She never told anyone and she just wasted away in her bed. I saw her a few times during the course of the illness, but she refused any assistance other than the home visits. My friend, Alison, the missionary also became involved. We all did exactly what Ms. Brown wanted, which was to help her never leave her home in her little apartment.

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The students. When I refer to “the students” I mean the Baylor students who were in my community health clinical groups. Each semester I had two groups of eight students. Very few of them had ever been exposed to the levels of poverty and unmet health needs they were immersed in through  this work in refugee communities. They worked with me as partners in learning about community health through providing community health services. The students operated in two-person teams in designated neighborhoods. They learned about community health through finding people with problems and alongside the patients, solving the problems – and never just referring people to somewhere else.

As much as possible, they went through “the healthcare system” with patients; students learning, for example what the Parkland OB clinics are like: a waiting room with 50-100 plastic chairs; waiting room floor sticky with spilled soft drinks and baby formula, Cheetos, whatever; maybe 16 exam rooms around the waiting room (my memory is clouded re some details); someone shouting/mispronouncing patient names (you better not miss hearing your name called); and once in the exam room, being seen by a different person on every appointment (expect another vaginal exam); being sent out from exam not having any idea what next.

Eventually, as we developed the Agape Clinic (a-ga-pe) as a community resource, the students spent more and more time in the clinic, though we never abandoned the home visits and community outreach. In the clinic students had responsibilities that rotated week to week – triage, manager, exam rooms (5), pharmacy. As was the case with the outreach/home visits/district health model, students had significant responsibility and autonomy. Oh, what a job they did!

Here is a description of the work, in the streets http://ckjournal.com/in-the-streets and more on the Agape Clinic http://ckjournal.com/agape-clinic-recollections

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On San Jacinto. In one of the apartment buildings in the 4000 block of San Jacinto there was a Vietnamese woman who had some unspecified mental health problems that were manifested in part by her yelling and sometimes fighting with neighbors. She had a dream one night that her apartment was filled with Buddhist and Catholic religious statues. She began putting religious statues in her apartment according to the dream and as the apartment was filled, she quit the yelling and fighting. She became something like a fortune-teller. Although she didn’t have any outstanding health needs, I would stop in at her apartment when I could. She would fix coffee for the two of us and we would sit at her kitchen table and talk.

In the same building there was an old Vietnamese couple living with a teenage girl named Thuy who was deaf and mute. The man had a stroke. He survived but was completely incapacitated. By some miracle he ended up in a nursing home just a mile or so from the apartment. His wife would walk to the facility every day to bathe and feed him. When he died the funeral service was held in a South Dallas funeral home. I remember his wife and Thuy ended up on their knees on the floor in front of the coffin, wailing and falling out. After school Thuy went to work at Fiesta groceries and did well, as far as I could tell.

In the same building there was a Cambodian woman who was married to a White man who was somehow involved in drugs. One day Leslie called me and said I should come to her office right away. When I got there the Cambodian woman was sitting under the conference table in Leslie’s office. She had appalling stitched lacerations on her body. Two men had come into the apartment and stabbed her husband to death, raped her, and slashed her. She had been taken to the ER and when they were done with her, a missionary named Chuck brought her to Leslie’s office. I went to her apartment to let the police know where she was. I remember how polite the homicide detective was when he questioned me (everyone is a suspect in their world). I remember that there was an amazing amount of blood on the bed, floor, walls, and even the ceiling.

In the same building there was a Lao family – three generations in a small apartment. They had pigeon cages covering several windows with the pigeons free to come and go to the outside world and a sliding door on the inside. At night whenever someone wanted they could open the sliding door and reach into the cage – pigeon for dinner. Eggs, too. The same family had a big aquarium filled with popcorn and big grubs eating the popcorn – grubs for dinner.

Across the street a widow with two sons lived in an upstairs apartment. One day the brothers were arguing over a bowl of rice. One of them stabbed the other, who fell out the window and died.

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Get-away. The students ran across a 16 year-old girl who was living with a man in his mother’s second-story apartment on Virginia Street. The girl wanted to leave, but the boyfriend and his mother wouldn’t let her. The students talked with the police, but they had already been in contact with the girl and she was uncooperative. Now, she said, she had to get out. The police wouldn’t help, so the students and I came up with a plan for the students to make a home visit and distract the mother. While that was happening in the living room, the girl was throwing her possessions (in three black plastic trash sacks) out the window to me waiting down below in my blue Toyota pick-up in the driveway between two apartment buildings. The girl then walked out of the room she shared with her boyfriend and followed by the students, walked out of the apartment to the alley where I was waiting. Away we all went to the police office. One of the police officers bought the girl a bus ticket to LA where she had family in Compton. She was back with the boyfriend in about a month.

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A man with a gun. In one of the apartments on Annex Street a Chinese woman from Vietnam ran a little store out of her apartment. People could buy soft drinks, snacks, and the like. One of her daughters had a large nevus (mole) on her face. The mother told her daughter the reason she had it was because in a previous life she had wasted her husband’s money. A dermatologist at Children’s Medical Center Girl decided it was appropriate to remove it surgically.

On the day of surgery I went to the apartment to drive the girl and her mother to CMC. The girl got in the truck first and said, “My mother says there’s a man with a gun in our building.” I said, “Tell her to get in the truck now.” The girl said, “There’s the man.” Sure enough a man was walking towards us and he had a pistol (like a .357) stuck in his jeans. I reached across the girl and pulled her mother into the truck and was backing up across chunks of concrete and curbs and whatever. Meanwhile, a man in a white car picked up the man with the gun. I drove around the block to the police storefront and told them about the man and several of them took off toward the apartment. We went on to CMC, where preoperatively they gave the girl a fentanyl sucker which pretty quickly got her all smiley and goofy. The surgery went well. The guy with the gun got away but an hour or so later got into a gunfight with the police on Central Expressway.

I found the first explication of what I was trying to trying to do for most of my life. It is in a memorandum written in 1978 to Elsie Griffith, the executive director of the Dallas Visiting Nurse Association. At the time, I was working on planning and implementing the VNA Terminal Care Program, which was foundational for the first hospice in Texas. In hospice we focused intensively on managing physical symptoms at the end-of-life, such as pain, nausea, shortness of breath, etc.; and on supporting families. The subject here is the spiritual and ethical structuring of this work. It’s hard to believe I sent this and that Elsie accepted it and believed in the vision. Here it is, exactly as I sent it:

——————

June 9, 1978

To: Elsie Griffith

From: Charles Kemp

I feel a strong need to express something that is difficult to express— namely, the spirit which I think should be part of our terminal care program.

I hope we all recognize that the way we die in America is generally poor. To illustrate this let me tell you about a situation I am presently experiencing: Several weeks ago someone called me to say that a friend of theirs was dying of cancer of the breast metastatic to brain, ribs, spine, abdomen, etc. and would I see what I could do to help. The person in question is a 41-year-old woman (Jan) whose 2 teenage daughters live with her husband in another residence. Jan’s mother has been taking care of her for about 7 months and is physically and emotionally exhausted. If relief is not forth coming, Jan will have to go to a nursing home. We have been helping with home health aides and nursing but it’s not enough.

I went to see Jan on a Friday night before I left for a week in California. I found her to be in excruciating pain and to have paraplegia. There were only a few hours left before I had to leave town and although I tried, I could not find any relief. When I returned from California I called and discovered that Jan was on the way to a nursing home.

After visiting her once and seeing what the situation was I committed myself to stay with her 2 nights a week. I can’t say exactly why — I’ve never done this before — sometimes something happens when people meet or when situations present — maybe I ‘m seeing me or my wife — or maybe I have the need to stay grounded (as much as is possible) in the reality of dying as I plan for helping people die as humans.

Staying in a nursing home at night is a strange, sad, and sometimes bizarre experience:

Me: “She needs something for pain”
Nurse: “I don’t work that hall.”
Me: “Where is the other nurse?”
Nurse: “He’s gone.”
Me: “When will he be back?”
Nurse: “15 minutes.”
Me: “She’s really in a lot of pain.”
Nurse: “I don’t work that hall.”
Me: “Are you saying you won’t do anything?”
Nurse: “I don’t work that hall.”

At midnight an aide walks in, turns the light on and off and starts to walk out. I ask her what she’s doing. “Checking the light.” — and out she goes.

Ice pitchers are filled at 5:30 A.M.

And much more. It’s a kind of dumb, passive brutality.

I know you’ve heard and seen a thousand variations on thig sorry tale. You know about the terrible loneliness and dehumanization of dying. You have in your possession some scientifically-oriented things I’ve written about this. So probably I’m trying to touch you with something that is touching me very deeply: The spirit of the terminal care program:

To be touched and to be able to touch people who are lonely and afraid. To be not afraid to feel. To work from the mind and the heart. To experience the personal loneliness and fear that lies within (us all). To care enough not to need to be the hero. To work through the family. This is difficult for me to express. I’ m not looking just for increased services; I’m looking for something that will touch people at every level.

When these things are happening, the people (nurses, aides, social workers, doctors, volunteers, etc.) who are experiencing them need to have to have an incredibly strong support system.

I tell you, I am committed to planning and operationalizing a program which will give what is needed. And I’m firm in my knowledge and belief that this spirit I have so inadequately expressed above is vital to meeting the needs of people who are dying.

Thank you,

—————–

Jan went home a few days later and she died peacefully at home a few months later. She was a brave woman.

The night in the “dumb, passive brutality” of that nursing home was inspirational to me. I’m not saying that over time my colleagues and I ended the ugliness, but at least for people with end-stage cancer, ALS, and other afflictions there are now much kinder, more supportive, and more clinically effective options all across America – and that’s exactly what we were aiming for.

2013 was a great year, 2014 was a hard year, 2015 was impossible

Two friends were here for dinner yesterday evening. At some point we began talking about what we were doing 10 years ago. Not surprisingly, there had been changes and losses for all of us. Here is a partial account of what I didn’t say.

10 years ago on New Years Eve of 2014 I was at a gathering with other members of the Atrium Obscurum crew, the people I worked with to put on forest psytrance events. It was an all-night psychedelic party, with most people tripping and others rolling. At some point we gathered around a firepit behind the house and had one of those ceremonies where everyone writes on a piece of paper something they want to let go of from the past year and then one by one, say a few words, and toss that burden into the fire. When it was my turn I said that 2013 was one of the best years of my life and I had nothing to unburden myself of. I said I hoped 2014 would be as good.

A few months into 2014 Leslie began to decline and 2014 got harder and harder and harder until in March of 2015 she passed away. Then the grief. Late 2014 and into 2015 was one of the two hardest times of my life, the other being my 13 months in Vietnam. Below is brief description of a couple of days in Vietnam.

2024 is unfolding as a good year.

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At the “The Hill Fights: The First Battle of Khe Sanh”

I came in with another man on a helicopter to link up with B/1/9 (B Company, 1st Battalion, 9th Marine Regiment) on an operation at the DMZ. When the helicopter came in to where B Co was in those dry hills, the LZ was getting hit with mortars. I didn’t know what was happening and it was a complete surprise when the chopper was about 10 feet off the ground and the crew chief put his boot in my back and pushed me out, followed by a rain of ammo, C-rations, etc. they were tossing off the chopper. There were a lot of mortars coming in, too and I made it to a little hole full of Marines. When I dove in on top of them some lieutenant was telling me to get the hell out and I was just burrowing into the pile, not going anywhere.

The next thing I remember was described in the book, “The Hill Fights” by Edward Murphy. Murphy is writing about someone named Montgomery:

“Corporal Montgomery struggled with the heavy load his team carried as they sought cover. They had almost made it when a brace of mortar shells crashed behind them. The twin blasts threw Montgomery into the brush. When he came to a few minutes later, blood flowed from shrapnel wounds in his right thigh, right hand, left arm, left buttocks, and the right side of his neck.

He says, ‘I looked around. No one else was there.’ Mortar shells were still exploding along the ridgeline… I was afraid I’d been out for a while and had been overlooked in a withdrawal, so I crawled on all fours to a nearby bomb crater. I hurt too bad to go any further, so I started calling for help.’

Two marines hiding in another crater answered. As soon as I told them that I was wounded they crawled over and patched me up. ‘Where is everybody?’ Montgomery asked. ‘Where did they go? Are they all right?’ The two marines told him what they knew which was not much, then Montgomery asked them for a favor. Montgomery pulled a camera from his pack and handed it to one of the men, and with mortar shells crashing behind them the man took Montgomery’s picture. ‘What a souvenir that’ll make,’ he thought. As soon as the mortars stopped Montgomery’s two new friends helped him back to the main body.

(I was the man who took Montgomery’s photo. He was sitting in the dirt in the crater, very bloody, smiling, shooting me the finger.)

Minutes later without a word everyone began to move out. The few remaining able-bodied Marines grabbed the wounded and dead and started humping. The men moved with a single-minded goal: get out of the killing zone. The NVA was not going to let that happen.

About ten men made it safely over the ridgeline before the mortars came again. In rapid succession more than a dozen high explosive shells wracked the column. Marines dove left and right seeking cover on the barren hillside. Still, chunks of hot metal found flesh. Up and down the column men were crying out in pain. Some were wounded for the second time that day. More than half a dozen were also freshly wounded and desperate cries of, ‘Corpsman!’ ‘Corpsman up!’ echoed across the hillside. This attack pushed B/1/9 to its limit. They were burdened with more casualties than they could carry, without food for two days, with little water, low on ammo, and without any prospect of evading the enemy. Some in the unit saw no sense in continuing this way. The ambulatory and uninjured might make it to Khe Sanh if the dead and the badly wounded were left behind. Captain Sayers never considered this. Bravo company would succeed or fail as a unit. That was the way it was. There were no other options. The survivors would sell their lives for a high price, taking as many enemy with them as they could.” END QUOTE

Somewhere on the barren hillside, not far up the trail, we got the wounded man to safety. There was a depression in the trail and there were people tending to a another wounded Marine there. He was dying and they were trying to save him, but when they turned him over some of his insides fell out of his back and he died.

In thinking about this I’ve never been able to remember where the trail finally went. Now I know. Farther up the trail a few helicopters came to take out the last casualties and by the time they got to the dead men, there was extra room on the last chopper. So I got out safely and B/1/9 was linked with K/3/9 (K Co., 3^rd Bn, 9^th Marine Regiment).  

In November 2009 I wrote about what happened with me next:

(11/2009) I was flying out of an operation, in a chopper with a lot of weapons and several bodies. We were flying low, coming up on any enemy too fast for them to hit us except they did, bullets banging into the chopper and it started spinning except the pilot flared it some and though we slammed hard into the ground. It wasn’t a disaster – except for the fact that we had just been shot down by people with bad intent who were undoubtedly headed our way from not very far away. We set up some guns and in just a few minutes we began to take a little fire and then another chopper got there and we dragged the bodies to the other chopper and got out of there (calling in artillery fire on the downed chopper).

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Writing this has been a comfort to me. It doesn’t really bother me much anymore. It’s crazy to think that these things and more happened. The comfort I take is related to the war in Ukraine. I’ve been worrying about the Ukrainian soldiers who are going through heavier combat than I ever did. How can they process it later in life? As I reread the above, I think that if I’m OK, maybe some of them can be, too.

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I read all this to Jean. I am thankful to her for hearing it.